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  • As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

    And to think, we're still in the early innings.

    By Marilyn Elias, USA TODAY

    Signs abound that the battered economy is causing serious damage to the mental health and family lives of a growing number of Americans.

    Requests for therapists have soared, Americans say they're stressed out, and domestic-violence and suicide hotlines are reporting increased calls.

    "I've never seen this level of anxiety and depression in 22 years of practice," says Nancy Molitor, a psychologist in Wilmette, Ill. "The mental health fallout has been far worse than after 9/11."

    There has been a sharp rise in mental trauma even among those who still have jobs: The demand for therapists surged 40% from June to December — driven largely by money-related fears — at ComPsych, which runs the nation's largest employee-assistance mental-health program, says ComPsych chairman and CEO Richard Chaifetz. Nearly half of Americans said they were more stressed than a year ago, and about one-third rated their stress level as "extreme" in surveys out in September from the American Psychological Association. That was before the stock-market dive.

    Meanwhile, financial advisers say they're finding themselves in a new abnormal "normal." John Jones, a financial planner at ComPsych, says he's referring many more workers to counselors. "They start crying. They tell me they're not eating or sleeping. One even said about his family, 'They'd be better off without me,' " Jones says. Many colleagues around the USA are having the same experience, he adds.

    Joy Browne, a New York psychologist whose WOR-based radio talk show airs in 200 cities and live online, says she hears "a lot of free-floating anxiety." Many callers have been laid off. "But even if they have jobs, they fear they're going to lose them. People are kind of holding their breath."

    [..]

    "These couples are living in separate rooms, unhappily," says Priscilla Marotta, a psychologist in Plantation, Fla., who increasingly sees this scenario.

    Molitor, the suburban Chicago therapist, says she's noticing physically abused spouses staying in marriages because the economy has shrunk their options. "More people are living in homes that are kind of like tinderboxes now — they blow up every once in a while," says Karen Myatt, a divorce lawyer in Fort Lauderdale whose practice is shifting to domestic violence.

    Calls to the National Domestic Violence Hotline have shot up during the recession, says spokeswoman Retha Fielding. For example, there were 21% more calls in September than in September 2007. When the stock market plunged in October, there were 18% more calls than in October 2007.

    "And we hear more and more about money. 'We're about to lose the house, my husband lost his job.' " Domestic violence is about power and control, Fielding says, "so if an abuser loses control of one part of his life, he's going to try harder to get control at home."

    cont.

  • #2
    Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

    Originally posted by babbittd View Post
    Signs abound that the battered economy is causing serious damage to the mental health and family lives of a growing number of Americans.
    This was and continues to be like one giant hangover after the past decade (or more) of credit euphoria. Now that everyone in the entire business and financial structure (from CEOs down to the hourly workers) are recovering after a decade long night out drinking, we are in for a major set of withdrawal symptoms.

    Once people realize that it's just money, and as long as you can provide the basics for you and your family in the form of food, clothing, and shelter (in that order) then people won't get so stressed out. Repeat after me: "Grow it, Sew it, Build it." After all, it *is* just money. All it is used for is a medium of exchange, there's nothing special about it. It has no magical powers and certainly cannot produce anything on its own. When people realize that they have been led astray by the bank$ters into believing in the power of money, they will see the fallacy of their ways.
    Every interest bearing loan is mathematically impossible to pay back.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

      Originally posted by ricket View Post
      This was and continues to be like one giant hangover after the past decade (or more) of credit euphoria. Now that everyone in the entire business and financial structure (from CEOs down to the hourly workers) are recovering after a decade long night out drinking, we are in for a major set of withdrawal symptoms.

      Once people realize that it's just money, and as long as you can provide the basics for you and your family in the form of food, clothing, and shelter (in that order) then people won't get so stressed out. Repeat after me: "Grow it, Sew it, Build it." After all, it *is* just money. All it is used for is a medium of exchange, there's nothing special about it. It has no magical powers and certainly cannot produce anything on its own. When people realize that they have been led astray by the bank$ters into believing in the power of money, they will see the fallacy of their ways.
      its not that simple. Some people are losing homes, kids are living in homeless shelters because families can't afford to take care of them. Kids are going hungry because families don't have money. I agree with you, it is just money but when you can't even cover the basics OR when you see that in the near future you wont be able to cover food clothing and shelter people start to distill.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

        I've seen a bit of both sides. I've seen people panicking because they can no longer afford to pay the yard man, the maid, the private school, etc. Those folks need to get a grip. I've also seen quite a few who were barely getting by with two incomes in the best of times, now facing disaster because they had little savings and simply can't make it on one income. ( or no income!)

        Any solution to this mess had better include jobs for working class people. Without that we will have a real mess on our hands. They'll be either on the dole or rioting in the streets. Neither is a good solution. Tax breaks may stimulate somewhat, but frankly won't help the majority of these people who don't pay taxes anyway, except to perhaps provide a few more jobs.

        Providing aid to millionaire home builders, bankers, and real estate agents is not the answer. They had their run, and the wise ones banked their windfall. They'll be fine. Let the unwise ones sink. In what other industry to you have record profits year after year for decades and still continue to borrow 10-20 times your net worth? Whatever happened to the concept of REINVESTING profits in the business. Every home builder and RE agent I know had a mini-mansion, a Lexus, second home, Hummer, etc and now they are crying for congress to start the whole charade over again by encouraging lending. My father was a home builder in the early 80s. Fortunately, he saved his previous windfalls and when the recession hit, was able to weather the storm and actually made good money by self financing his homes. That kind of concept is apparently foreign these days. Now its all about the ability to borrow money.

        Jobs are the answer for people surviving this mess. The question is how do we provide them? Build roads, public works, etc?
        Last edited by flintlock; February 08, 2009, 10:31 AM.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

          The ending of the article is a must read.

          Maybe there's no quick fix in sight, but Americans have been through bad times before, and some have thrived despite adversity. How they did it is a lesson for us all, says psychologist Salvatore Maddi of University of California-Irvine. He coined the term "hardy personality" after studying more than 400 Illinois Bell Telephone managers who faced layoffs or changes in their jobs amid deregulation of their industry three decades ago.
          Maddi's 12-year pioneering study found that those who stayed on an even keel emotionally and kept their health shared three key qualities missing from colleagues who developed anxiety disorders or health problems.
          The hardy people stayed committed to what they were doing; they didn't back off or become alienated. They also sought control, trying to influence what happened to them, looking at every avenue for solutions. They saw stressful changes as inevitable and took them as a challenge, an opportunity to grow.
          In this frightening economy, "it helps to have a broader perspective," Maddi says. "People have recovered from this kind of thing before. Rather than bemoaning one's plight, it's important to come up with action plans that might make a difference."
          Pam Salter, who's living in the tiny trailer with her unemployed husband and two boys, takes pride in her own fighting spirit and determination to make it through. In fact, she named her younger son after James J. Braddock, the boxer in Cinderella Man whose comeback allowed him to pay back every dime he got in welfare payments during the Depression.
          "That moment showed such pride and honor," she says. "I hope to keep our spirits high and hold onto our honor. But it isn't easy."
          We all know that not every persons' circumstances are exactly the same, and that the "whose fault is it really", chicken-and-egg debate can go on forever. But personally I am still just stunned as to what our societal "financial conciousness" has obviously evolved into.

          As a kid growing up on a farm, I remember my dad talking about how his grandparents, back in the 30's, survived on fried eggs for breakfast, scrambled eggs for dinner, and boiled eggs for supper for many a day. That kind of stuff hit me hard. But being the typical rebellious punk kid, I did resent the hell out of the seemingly endless choreload and all the boring living-within-ones-means and the saving lectures.

          Whatever the circumstances, everyone is going to have to come to the realization that we CANNOT go back, we can only go forward. I appreciate what Eric Jenzen talked about in a post a while back, about how the time will be here soon when people will no longer want/need to hear about how bad it is, but rather they will want to hear about solutions.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

            In the Great Depression - how much mortgage did people have?

            A lot of people in that era had very little debt.

            How do you survive these days? When most people have lots of debt?

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

              Co-worker recently bought a $1,000 camera he 'had to have'.

              Before he bought it we had a serious discussion about want VS need.

              He ignored me.

              Today he showed me his new 500 gig external hard drive.

              This is the same guy who on Friday told me there is no way he can lose his job because it would financially destroy him.

              Oh yea, we work for a company which is laying off 8,000 soon - 40% in our area.

              Go figure…

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                Exactly, its a different world. Not only with the expense you need today to buy your way into a better neighborhood, but all the other stuff you "need". My father lived in a nice but simple home during the depression. His father built it with his own hands. No codes, no inspections, no AC. Most of the neighbors lived in similar homes, sometimes on land passed down to them from previous generations. Most had little or no mortgage, nor much savings, yet they were some of the finest people you'd ever want to meet. You'd get your throat slashed in most neighborhoods today that a young couple starting out could afford to pay cash or have that small a mortgage . Homes on that same street today sell for $600,000+.

                Its just a more complex world. More material things, but also more expense in maintaining it all. Phones, cell phones, central heat and air, cars, car insurance, health insurance, numerous govt fees, homeowners insurance, higher taxes, and on and on. All things they could make do without because that was the norm. Try to get a job without a phone today. So its really hard to compare.

                Speaking of increased domestic violence. I was out walking in my neighborhood yesterday with my wife and six sheriff cars and an ambulance drove by. They surrounded a home and were trying to get someone to come out. Definitely not something you usually see in my neighborhood. Sign of the times perhaps?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                  Originally posted by flintlock View Post
                  Its just a more complex world. More material things, but also more expense in maintaining it all. Phones, cell phones, central heat and air, cars, car insurance, health insurance, numerous govt fees, homeowners insurance, higher taxes, and on and on. All things they could make do without because that was the norm. Try to get a job without a phone today. So its really hard to compare.
                  It is so true! I would like to build a 100 or sq. ft home on a 1-3 acre plot, but it would cost $30-60,000 just for the land. That is without utilities, road access, and many other modern amenities. It is simply insane!

                  I do not want any of those things, but they are practically forced upon you in this country. I abhor phones, but no one will hire you without one. I despise cars, but try to getting anywhere in suburban America without one. So on and so forth. It is just vexing as hell.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                    Originally posted by BadJuju View Post
                    I despise cars, but try to getting anywhere in suburban America without one. So on and so forth. It is just vexing as hell.
                    I love my car. Cars get a bad rap. I love gliding along in it on the freeway right at the speed limit, getting good mileage, sitting in comfort. I still marvel at the miracle of gliding along at 60 mph in -20 degree weather in heated comfort, listening to music of my choice, sitting in a leather chair as comfortable as in my living room. This is a wonderful thing. Beats the hell out of plodding along in that weather on foot or on a horse or in a carriage. I love maintaining my car. I find the technology fascinating. I bought it new - my first and only new car in my life - and have had it eight years and plan to have it possibly the rest of my life. Since I repair and maintain it myself and bought it with cash, it is very affordable. The cost of insurance has shrunk as it's gotten older and soon I will keep only the minimum insurance on it, making the whole thing quite affordable.

                    Cars are a fantastic invention. Human beings want to be able to move around in comfort and at good speed. Cars have evolved as they have and are as popular as they are because they satisfy a very strong human need very well. No public mass transportation has all the satisfying qualities that a car does.

                    Yes, there are other things that cost money that are more important than a car, but not a lot of them in my opinion: food, shelter, clothing, internet (even more than a phone). I too like to live simply and inexpensively, in a modest well-kept house and with basic good quality clothes and tools. But I object to what has become a stereotypical knee-jerk dismissal of the car as some sort of object of social decay. If you outlawed cars or made it impossible for people to afford them, you would not make society a better place. Taking away affordable, highly convenient, individually customizably transportation and trying to fit people into buses, subways, trains, and bikes would not increase our overall level of happiness. We have so many cars because they satisfy our needs much better and we like them much better than the alternatives. No one is forced to buy a car. People buy them because they want them. If you don't want one, live in the central city. No one is stopping you.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                      Originally posted by Mn_Mark View Post
                      I love my car. Cars get a bad rap. I love gliding along in it on the freeway right at the speed limit, getting good mileage, sitting in comfort. I still marvel at the miracle of gliding along at 60 mph in -20 degree weather in heated comfort, listening to music of my choice, sitting in a leather chair as comfortable as in my living room. This is a wonderful thing. Beats the hell out of plodding along in that weather on foot or on a horse or in a carriage. I love maintaining my car. I find the technology fascinating. I bought it new - my first and only new car in my life - and have had it eight years and plan to have it possibly the rest of my life. Since I repair and maintain it myself and bought it with cash, it is very affordable. The cost of insurance has shrunk as it's gotten older and soon I will keep only the minimum insurance on it, making the whole thing quite affordable.

                      Cars are a fantastic invention. Human beings want to be able to move around in comfort and at good speed. Cars have evolved as they have and are as popular as they are because they satisfy a very strong human need very well. No public mass transportation has all the satisfying qualities that a car does.

                      Yes, there are other things that cost money that are more important than a car, but not a lot of them in my opinion: food, shelter, clothing, internet (even more than a phone). I too like to live simply and inexpensively, in a modest well-kept house and with basic good quality clothes and tools. But I object to what has become a stereotypical knee-jerk dismissal of the car as some sort of object of social decay. If you outlawed cars or made it impossible for people to afford them, you would not make society a better place. Taking away affordable, highly convenient, individually customizably transportation and trying to fit people into buses, subways, trains, and bikes would not increase our overall level of happiness. We have so many cars because they satisfy our needs much better and we like them much better than the alternatives. No one is forced to buy a car. People buy them because they want them. If you don't want one, live in the central city. No one is stopping you.
                      and while we're at it... i love the suburbs.

                      the city's to much of a hassle... noise, crime, etc.

                      the country's too far from the city... where the food and entertainment are.

                      ah, the suburbs. 20 min. from the city and country... quiet, i can park, no crime... just right.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                        Originally posted by BadJuju View Post
                        It is so true! I would like to build a 100 or sq. ft home on a 1-3 acre plot, but it would cost $30-60,000 just for the land. That is without utilities, road access, and many other modern amenities. It is simply insane!

                        I do not want any of those things, but they are practically forced upon you in this country. I abhor phones, but no one will hire you without one. I despise cars, but try to getting anywhere in suburban America without one. So on and so forth. It is just vexing as hell.
                        Badjuju,

                        There is an alternative. Living on a sailboat near a city and using a bike for transport frees a person from property tax, and many local government fees and such.

                        Cheap transport and great exercise are the benefits.

                        When I was in the boating business I used my bike to go everywhere and anywhere.

                        Partially disassembled it all fit into a bag checked as luggage for air travel. At the destination I assembled the bike, tied the luggage, bike bag and tools to the rear rack and rode past the row of taxis and busses on my out of the airport.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: As economic fears rise, families on verge of unraveling

                          Originally posted by bobola View Post
                          Badjuju,

                          There is an alternative. Living on a sailboat near a city and using a bike for transport frees a person from property tax, and many local government fees and such.

                          Cheap transport and great exercise are the benefits.

                          When I was in the boating business I used my bike to go everywhere and anywhere.

                          Partially disassembled it all fit into a bag checked as luggage for air travel. At the destination I assembled the bike, tied the luggage, bike bag and tools to the rear rack and rode past the row of taxis and busses on my out of the airport.
                          you talked me into it. i'm moving to a warmer climate.

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