Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

[cityqat]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I, too, have checked the political correctness at the door. I completely agree that you should be able to state your mind on this forum. I apologize if I made you nervous or tremble with the idea of a female contributor or if you disagree with my statements of fact. I am truly sorry to have had an opinion that rocked your world (even if for just a second).

[roxtar]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I'd like to see what would be said if a female wrote an article portraying a man in this same light.

Happens all the time ma'am. Only difference is that instead of loss of money being the straw that breaks the marriage's back, it's sex.

I can't help but be incredulous at your assertion that women don't paint men with a VERY broad brush.

[cityqat]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

Happens all the time ma'am. Only difference is that instead of loss of money being the straw that breaks the marriage's back, it's sex.

I can't help but be incredulous at your assertion that women don't paint men with a VERY broad brush.

I did not "assert that women don't paint men with a VERY broad brush". In fact, the women that are mentioned in this article DO.
I merely intended to assert that women have the same issue as men - protectionism of finances via a prenup.

[roxtar]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I merely intended to assert that women have the same issue as men - protectionism of finances via a prenup.

Ahhh, true love.

I felt it important to separate (and protect) the financial aspect of myself, and the relationship from the haze that love can create.

I used to think I was jaded. Turns out I wasn't jaded, I was right.

[Guest]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

Cityqat -

In response to your unnecessarily acerbic response - you are snapping at the wrong guy. I don't know if you noticed, but if you carefully reread my post, I did not give the slightest hint as to what my own position is substantively on the points you were commenting about. As to what cultural mores or implicit bigotry you presume me to be all "nervous and trembling" about, I do suggest you not caricature those who merely interject comments expressing mild disagreement with PC conformity however. Projecting some sort of male infantility upon those who venture to mildly disagree does not advance your argument.

I, too, have checked the political correctness at the door. I completely agree that you should be able to state your mind on this forum. I apologize if I made you nervous or tremble with the idea of a female contributor or if you disagree with my statements of fact. I am truly sorry to have had an opinion that rocked your world (even if for just a second).

[DaveBrown42]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

Personally, I suspect most men who's wives leave them over this sort of thing generally have it coming to them.

Exactly. Think of the picture of the "wall street jock" that we've seen painted in a few articles here; cocky, showoffish, etc. It would not surprise me in the least if this is the type of woman they attract. There are nice and not-so-nice people of both genders, and quite often they tend to find each other.

I can say with 100% confidence that my wife is nothing like the women described in the article, because I never made a point of trying to impress women with wealth, and so I found a woman who, like myself, is far less concerned with material things than with other sources of happiness.

In short: Picking your dates up in a Dodge Aries is a much more effective form of "toxic wife" prevention than a prenup.

[ER59]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I'd venture to say that most, if not all, women are a little bit like this.

I've lived 2/3 of my life in Russia and 1/3 in US and I haven't met a single toxic wife. I am a female and all my friends are hard working, loyal and supportive partners, sometimes breadwinners of their families but we are "simple" people and none of us have millions. Reading about toxic wives is like reading about life of celebrities: it has nothing to do with any of us.

[labasta]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I've lived 2/3 of my life in Russia and 1/3 in US and I haven't met a single toxic wife. I am a female and all my friends are hard working, loyal and supportive partners, sometimes breadwinners of their families but we are "simple" people and none of us have millions. Reading about toxic wives is like reading about life of celebrities: it has nothing to do with any of us.

You're probably right, but women tend to fail to detect a potential "toxic woman". I've known a couple of them and their female friends all said how lovely said female was. Single professional men, as they reach their late twenties, develop a toxic sixth sense in women. It's at the same age that women in Europe (I heard women tend to marry in their early twenties in the US) are looking for security and marriage. Said woman is usually blond, big tits, long legs, pretty and good figure: your standard drug sales rep ;)

On the other hand, I've known a man who was similiar. He frauded a lot of money out of his exes.

It's all about the security/sex ratio. One partner may offer a little bit more of one side than the other. It seems in the above article, that these women are at the extremes.

I'm very lucky that my partner is looking for love and fun (and she found it). She values security, don't get me wrong, but the life she has already created for herself has generally done this for her already.

I've also learnt that a man with an average income in a very secure job is the real currency for a lot of women rather than flashing wealth. But great sex and laughter tend to trump even this (depends on the woman of course).

[jk]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

one of donald trump's consorts [marla maples, perhaps?] was asked if she would be in the relationship if he didn't have any money. she replied, asking if the donald would be interested in her if she weren't beautiful. touche.

does anyone here doubt that had these women put on 100lbs and devoted their lives to serving the needy, these guys would have dumped them in a n.y. minute for a new trophy wife? who chooses a spouse whose main interests are nails, facials and expensive gifts? what are the "assets" these women bring to the relationship? hint: it is not their philosophical depth. the guys in these tales are as shallow as the women.

[c1ue]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I've known several 'toxic wives':

1) in-law. Married an uncle when he was making $400K/year exporting scrap metal to Asia for processing. Marriage fell apart exactly 1 year after US laws killed that gravy train

2) relative. Married a scion of a trading house family. He too was making $400K/year. Divorced after the main bloom came off the import rose (from Taiwan). Last I heard he had shacked up with an 19 year old mainlander.

3) Ex-co worker. Very interesting guy with a fascinating history. Went to Russia and married the hottest girl he could find - who happened to be exactly 30 years younger.

Once his gravy train ended (EDA industry went to stage 1 to stage 2), she divorced him and started hunting hedge fund managers.

The irony? Last I heard (from the guy himself) he was a kept man for a hedge fund managing woman.

As a guy who owns a Russian fighter jet, I must admit he has great pickup lines.

Maybe the next article will be about 'toxic husbands'.

:rolleyes:

[Starving Steve]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

Exactly. Think of the picture of the "wall street jock" that we've seen painted in a few articles here; cocky, showoffish, etc. It would not surprise me in the least if this is the type of woman they attract. There are nice and not-so-nice people of both genders, and quite often they tend to find each other.

I can say with 100% confidence that my wife is nothing like the women described in the article, because I never made a point of trying to impress women with wealth, and so I found a woman who, like myself, is far less concerned with material things than with other sources of happiness.

In short: Picking your dates up in a Dodge Aries is a much more effective form of "toxic wife" prevention than a prenup.

Don't forget the pre-nup, whatever you do and however you present yourself. That is the point of this discussion. That is the lesson here.

Just like you and employing the same logic as you did, I used to drive a junk car and figured that the car would drive-away the gold-diggers. It didn't. It just made them more curious about where the money was hidden.

Another lesson that I learned is that sex doesn't mean love. ;)

[tree]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

So what most of you guys are saying is that he married this woman because he "loved" her?

Is that it?

Or might it have been because he enjoyed the glances from other men when he was out in public with her on his arm? Or maybe the pretty picture she made in bed?

When it comes to shallow behavior, it's often, if not usually, a two-way street.

Jeez Louise.

[metalman]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

I, as a 31yr old female, asked for an equivalent to prenup "common-law living agreement contract" at age 29. It's about 12 pages in length and very thorough. It was drawn up by my lawyer and includes every aspect of the material relationship - it even spells out what would happen if we were to go our own separate ways. I felt it important to separate (and protect) the financial aspect of myself, and the relationship from the haze that love can create. Memories weaken as we age and I don't want that to be a factor if things go sour. My "husband" had no problem signing each and every page of this document in front of my lawyer.

As a female, I don't give a rat's ass about luxury, nails, meals, etc. This article paints a very poor picture of women, and I'm very sad to see that this discussion is predominantly men. I'd like to see what would be said if a female wrote an article portraying a man in this same light.

no risk, no relationship. your free psychotherapy from no one (me) and worth every penny... separating money from the marriage bond (trust) is a good way to keep one foot out the door in case you get nervous and the other foot needs to follow. keep that man under control!

cake wrote a sing for you! note jim nickerson 1:25 into the video.

[Jim Nickerson]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

no risk, no relationship. your free psychotherapy from no one (me) and worth every penny... separating money from the marriage bond (trust) is a good way to keep one foot out the door in case you get nervous and the other foot needs to follow. keep that man under control!

cake wrote a sing for you! note jim nickerson 1:25 into the video.

Nah, that guy's too freakin' old and too handsome.

[cityqat]

Re: Recession: When the money goes, so does the toxic wife

,

So what most of you guys are saying is that he married this woman because he "loved" her?

Is that it?

Or might it have been because he enjoyed the glances from other men when he was out in public with her on his arm? Or maybe the pretty picture she made in bed?

When it comes to shallow behavior, it's often, if not usually, a two-way street.

Jeez Louise.

Amen. Thanks for your very clear post, Tree.