having many kangaroos equals recession proof

[marvenger]

http://business.smh.com.au/business/...0603-buyq.html

[thunderdownunder]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

So - are you suspicious of our figures - it defies belief - people are spending - Unemployement has fallen - exports are up to China,Japan,Taiwan,Arab states and India -Avg. House prices are rising to 8x Avg.single persons income- Aus dollar going vertical- The Rains are 'ere - Fuel price is falling - Imports are way down - One State,Queensland, is selling anything that makes a profit for them in a down market to pay Huge debts and raising fuel costs and charges (all the other States have sold out of everything already -OK) -our Prime Minister speaks fluent Mandarin and is Choka block up anything with slant eyes without wearing a condom -Helicopters are seen dropping cash over the suburbs every other night (nite for you yanks) which we have to go and pick up before the paper turns to mush in the dew- we have gone from being in surplus of $80bill to owning in 2 years time a $300 bill debt and rising daily at the behest of God knows who is so powerful it can write our chits without our pen - Of the 11 banks in the world that have a AAA rating 4 of them are ours (mainly because they rip skin off if you walk in the door- competitive my ass)- Electrical power prices to consumers are going vertical because of the rise in coal prices (and they privatized the State owned power grids after mortgaging them to the hilt and spending nothing going forward in infrastructure) - People of all persuasions are flocking here because we have free health, free unemployement money, sunshine, police without auto weapons, weekends are "as you are and pass a B-B-Q chop with a beer please"- We manufacture a new sort of submarine that is so noisy that on 'silent running' it wakes up dogs 1500 miles from the sea and drives whales to beach themselves and it can't dive because it leaks worst than a senate committee. We made cars - Pontiac's G8's and GTO's that will rip concrete off a 747a runway and you can flog F#@*K out of all day every day but GM went broke and you don't need them, so its just the arabs now ------

But life is good, we are not part of the world so it don't worry us if you yanks are so broke you can't clean up properly after a small blow called Katrina and don't want a Muscle car that handles better than a BMW M series. In Fact we don't give a shit if your Navy is looking in worse repair than than the Russian junk laying idle in the Baltic, LAX can't park up the new better & bigger planes coming on stream, Your roads and bridges are falling apart, you actually pay for health care,you build homes out of plywood that fall over when you sneeze and depreciate quicker than a virgin at a love in. No we don't give a damn because we have it all - And lots of Frigging Roos that can defy gravity by eating green shoots and surviving, as well as Wombats - Who just drinks, eats, roots, and leaves. ( For you Yanks "roots" means have wild 'monkey sex' with a Ho- Ok ).
We have a secret weapon, we don't need a navy - We have Man eating salt water Crocodiles & box jelly fish to the north, 4 of the deadliest snakes on earth, in the middle, red back spiders and killer drop bears in the south, east and west so we just laugh in the face of recessions. We have no fear and mostly wakey wakey with hand on snaky.

[marvenger]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

Mate seriously I've got no f^%$#ng idea what's going on other than the fact the plutocracy has us over a barrel. They know we'll give up ours kids futures to their heirs to keep the system going, so that exactly what they'll take.

[The Outback Oracle]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

Why don't you tell it as it is Thunder???

My understanding of a wombat is that he is an animal who drinks and eats roots shoots and leaves.

[Thailandnotes]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

The fed is rigging the treasury market. Tax receipts are down 36 %. Oil will hit 300 dollars a barrel in three years. All the bailout money is the last money that won't be funny money. The dollar is toast. Asparagus will be as expensive as pot. A sip of water will cost a nickel. Forget bowling. All the lanes will be warped and you will have to retrieve your own ball, the wobbly one with the chip that you bought at a yard sale. Your water will be shut off. You'll wash your clothes in a barrel, but empty 55-gallon drums will sell for 55 dollars. Only your grandmother will have had braces. Crocodiles will enter the Potomac River and jelly fish stings will be 500 times more potent. Recipes with dairy products will be banned in newspapers. Beer companies will be nationalized. Attendance at sports events will be mandatory.

[thunderdownunder]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

Apologies to the Outback Oracle But he raises the point that we wombats have "shot our load" prematurely and when the Recession hits(and it will) we have spent it all and will have nothing in the tank to fight the fires that will decimate this great land - NOTHING AT ALL.
Bloody wankers - spent it because they could, without acknowledging the fact that they had NO evidence of recession.

The end result is we are in a lot of trouble down the track - if the rest of the world doesn't ignite with the pump priming fiasco going forward

I have a great recipe for "rabbit stew" if you need it.in the future.

[santafe2]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

The fed is rigging the treasury market. Tax receipts are down 36 %. Oil will hit 300 dollars a barrel in three years. All the bailout money is the last money that won't be funny money. The dollar is toast. Asparagus will be as expensive as pot. A sip of water will cost a nickel. Forget bowling. All the lanes will be warped and you will have to retrieve your own ball, the wobbly one with the chip that you bought at a yard sale. Your water will be shut off. You'll wash your clothes in a barrel, but empty 55-gallon drums will sell for 55 dollars. Only your grandmother will have had braces. Crocodiles will enter the Potomac River and jelly fish stings will be 500 times more potent. Recipes with dairy products will be banned in newspapers. Beer companies will be nationalized. Attendance at sports events will be mandatory.

It was all doom and gloom until I got to the bowling...I can live without bowling. And it might be a good idea to nationalize Bud and Coors, at least they couldn't make the beer worse than it is today...

[SuitablyIronic]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

We're living high on our last paycheck before unemployment. The resources boom that has fueled our standard of living in Australia has ended, but the last of the cheques is still coming through the mail.

End of this year is going to get real ugly down under. I am betting on an early election when the powers that be read the tea-leaves and see the storm that's coming in '10 is going to be a monster. Unemployment skyrocketing, house prices tumbling, state governments insolvent in technical and real senses, local councils unable to pay bills.

But maybe not, we have marsupials, and that makes all of the difference after all.

[nedtheguy]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

redacted

[metalman]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

I usually take the words "Fundamentally different" as a signal to run away fast.

right up there with That dreaded phrase: ''The system is fundamentally sound''

[marvenger]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

yes i think 'fundamentally different' can be interpreted as 'desperately trying to convince oneself' in this context. or desperately trying to create confidence. probably a mixture.

[thunderdownunder]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

Thus the Australian term "Wanker" or wakey wakey hand on snakey.
The britts have a term called "Bollocks" which is very rude (for them stiff upper lip types)
By the way ' Ned the guy' I work 120 clicks north of Isa and Im about to get the Boot ( similar to Simpsons episode) just a way bigger boots. We are up shite creek in a barbed wire canoe without a paddle 12 months out and the tide has turned.

[marvenger]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

I was just having a conversation with a guy who reckons its foreign coin propping up the inner city property market, all to do with all the demand for student housing. There's over 100,000 foreign students here and foreigners are trying to cash in on their own rental demand.

[Thailandnotes]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

I was just having a conversation with a guy who reckons its foreign coin propping up the inner city property market, all to do with all the demand for student housing. There's over 100,000 foreign students here and foreigners are trying to cash in on their own rental demand.

Enrollment at International schools in Bangkok is rising quickly. Thai students in NZ and Aus. are repatriating and going to school at home because it's cheaper.

[marvenger]

Re: having many kangaroos equals recession proof

don't blame them, foreign uni students are paying $100,000 for a degree and risking getting stabbed with screwdrivers in the process. dud deal.