When it comes to investing, people rarely say what they mean. Use this handy guide to translate.
When they say: "The stock market is experiencing a period of volatility."
They mean: "The stock market crashed."
When they say: "Stocks are in a bear market but are due to rally 50% or more soon."
They mean: "I stayed in the market all year waiting for it to come back. Now I'm praying for one last chance to get out."
When they say: "The stock market is oversold due to irrational fear and will come back soon."
They mean: "I had more than 70% of my net worth in stocks and if it doesn't come back soon I'm in trouble."
When they say: "Housing prices will recover soon."
They mean: "Most of my net worth is tied up in my house. If housing prices don't come back soon I'm in trouble."
When they say: "The price of gold will collapse to $200."
They mean: "I don't own any gold."
When they say: "The price of gold will fall to $400."
They mean: "I can't believe it's still over $750 when four week Treasury bills are at 0%, oil prices have collapsed over 70%, and the stock market is at 1998 levels."
When they say: "The price of gold will fall to $600 before recovering."
They mean: "I bought at $1000, sold at $900, bought at $800, sold at $700. Aaaarg!"
When they say: "Gold prices will fluctuate before some day reaching a peak of $2,500 or so."
They mean: "I bought gold in 2001 at $260 and have not traded it since."
When they say: "The price of gold will rise to $2,000 next year."
They mean: "I told my investors that the dollar was going to collapse and gold will shoot over $1,500 this year."
When they say: "Silver will go to $30 before gold goes to $1000."
They mean: "I own a lot of silver and hardly any gold."
When they say: "The economy will come back soon."
They mean: "I have hardly any savings and a lot of debt. If it doesn't come back soon I'm in trouble."
I'm sure you can think of other phrases to translate.
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